


Arms of a Man

by stalepearl



Category: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: Angst, Fluff, M/M, Self-Acceptance, Vulnerability
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-24
Updated: 2017-11-24
Packaged: 2019-02-06 06:10:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 512
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12811332
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stalepearl/pseuds/stalepearl
Summary: Maybe he liked feeling weak for Steve. The way his knees wobbled when he was kissed tenderly, or when the older teenager looked at him as if he was a piece of artwork. If that was weakness, Billy wanted to be weak his entire life.





	Arms of a Man

**Author's Note:**

> based off a song  
> (arms of a woman by amos lee)

Billy stared out into space, fingers absentmindedly rubbing circles into Steve’s chest. The other teenager was sleeping peacefully. His chest rose and fell with each breath. He looked up to examine the sleeping boy’s face. His eyelashes rested against his cheeks and his lips were slightly parted. Billy felt something in his chest that he often felt around Steve.

That he hadn’t felt for a long time before. 

He knew his house was miles away, and his birthplace was thousands of miles away, but he felt at home. Any other place in the world could never compare to this; a house in Indiana that didn’t even belong to him. Hell, he’d never even met the guy’s parents. But he wouldn’t rather be anywhere else. Not even California.

Not even with his mom.

The thought brought tears to his eyes, and he didn’t try to blink them away. He didn’t feel angry at himself for feeling emotional. For some reason, he liked to feel vulnerable around Steve. Maybe he expected to get hurt. Maybe he just enjoyed to let his feelings come out, rather than bottle them up. Rather than turn them into anger. 

Steve made him less angry. He was like light in the night that protected him from ghosts, or a blanket to hide under when the yelling got to be too much. He finally had a safe haven, and it was in a place he was taught was wrong. In the arms of another man. In a place of weakness.

Maybe he liked feeling weak for Steve. The way his knees wobbled when he was kissed tenderly, or when the older teenager looked at him as if he was a piece of artwork. If that was weakness, Billy wanted to be weak his entire life. He wanted to be defenseless. If Steve was a lion and Billy was a gazelle, he wouldn’t run. Sure, Steve may kill him, but was death really his number one concern? 

He sniffled quietly, feeling a tear fall. His chest felt pressured with something that made his face tingle and his hands clench. Billy wanted to wrap his arms around Steve and never let go; never let anything get him. Last thing he needed was to lose someone like Steve. 

Billy buried his face in Steve’s neck and sighed, relaxing against the older boy. 

He was at ease. He wasn’t angry or frustrated. He was calm and overwhelmed at the same time. Cautious but willing to give away everything for nothing. For once, he welcomed love. He welcomed weakness and vulnerability. He welcomed Steve, even though he knew Steve deserved so much more. 

He shut his eyes and pressed closer to the older teenager. 

Everything that troubled him was whisked away. All the pain, anger, and hate vanished as if the California tides swept it away, far out into the sea. He let sleep wash over him, not dreaming of west coast sunsets, but of a boy he was hopelessly in love with. 

If that was weakness, Billy wanted to be weak his entire life.


End file.
